Uncharted Terrain

A few photos from our Central American adventure

2011-07-15T15:54:00.000-07:00

We are spending a month in Costa Rica and Panama. We took a flight from Orlando to San Jose with a change of planes in Panama City.

Brother love at the airport when we changed plans in Panama City.

The view from the balcony of our rental house.

Ethan's photo of one of the ubiquitous birds in the yard.

In an effort to prevent mud slides on the roadways, the government is using concrete, poured directly on the hillsides. Somehow, I don't think this will work...

We had lunch at a local restaurant in Atenas. Yummy Peruvian.

The obligatory photo of the Friday farmer's market in Atenas.

We went to a very locals beach called Playa Azul. It wasn't the cleanest or best beach, but it did have the ruins of an outdoor pool.

In the U.S. we have rats. In Costa Rica they have iguanas.

This little guy was visiting us. He was in the shower and Ba caught him in a cup and put him in the yard.

This is a random view from the side of the road. It is very green here.

The next door neighbors went to the beach for the weekend and their kitten made herself at home in our house. Ryan loves that cat. They played long and hard and then took a well deserved nap.

A Bit About Costa Rica

2011-07-09T20:19:00.000-07:00

Costa Rica is as lush as its advertising. The hills are covered with thick green grass growing in tufts. The trees are varied, sometimes dotting, sometimes covering the hills. There are valleys so deeply cut into the landscape that seeing the rivers that run through them is impossible from the roadways that transverse them. All of this is just like the pictures. Costa Rica is a postcard.

Driving through the country is not a postcard. Most of the roads are unmarked and they all lead to San Jose. The problem is that no roads lead out of San Jose. Even if you try to leave on the street through which you entered, it will become a one way road (No hay paso) and the road running parallel to it turns out not be parallel after all.

San Jose itself has all of the drawbacks and almost none of the charms that other cities poses. The streets are narrow and unnamed. The pedestrians swarm across the roadways, or worse, walk along the edge of the road either due to lack of sidewalks or lack of desire to utilize them.

This is also true on the larger Routes through the country. A typical larger route, Ruta 27 for example, has 2 lanes divided by a yellow line. The yellow line marks the center of the roadway. It no in way means that each direction gets half of said road. It means that if you want to pass someone this is how far to one side of the car in front of you need to get to see if you can cut them off or if you will risk a head-on collision. From what I can tell, risking a head-on collision is just part of a normal day. There are slow lanes on the uphill sections of roads. These are to be considered good opportunities to pass on the right.

There are bus stops on all the major roads. People gather at these shelters to wait for the buses which crisscross the country or to sell fruit, or car parts, or pirated DVDs. People think nothing of walking along the edges of the roadway (which vary from about 3 feet wide to 6 feet wide). They walk their dogs, push their strollers, or watch their small children pick up rocks from the edge of the road.

The speed limit on large roads is 80kph maximo (about 50mph) and 40kph minimo (about 20mph). The fines for speeding can be as high as $500US. At least that’s what I’ve hear; I have no intention of testing this information. Effectively this means a trip that would take about an hour in the US takes about 1.5 to 2 hours in Costa Rica. Luckily, the scenery is amazing (except in San Jose).

It also seems to be mandatory that at least one in every 40 cars must be burning oil and on every road there must be no fewer than 5 turismos (tourist buses or vans) for every 100 cars. These must say TURISMO in funky writing reminiscent of the 1970s.

Have I mention the vacas (cows)? The hillsides are dotted with them. The cows here have perfected the art of the vertical ascent. They stand in defiance of gravity at impossible angles serenely gazing on the tufts of lush green grass. The chickens have not yet mastered this feat. They peck and run along the edges of every road. So far, none have attempted to end their lives under the wheels of the car, but I fear that it is just a matter of time.

Parking the car back at the rental house is no less of a challenge. The house is near the bottom of ~~a gently graded~~ steep hill. The driveway is a 70% inclined at 90degrees to the parking spot in front of the house. There is a low stone wall at one side which prevents the neighbor’s front yard from sliding into our driveway. In order to park, you need to swing wide into the left-hand side of the street and turn precisely between the wall and the iron fence in front of the rest of the yard. Once you are aligned, it is simply a matter of flooring the gas so the car climbs the incline into the yard and then applying the brakes in time to prevent opening the front door with the car. You have about 10 feet in which to accomplish this. Bonus points are awarded for doing this without making a loud screeching noise.

Once that’s accomplished, we’re home. Alas, the house is a topic for another entry.

(Oh, and don’t worry. Photos will follow once we get better internet here.)

A little bit of what we've been up to lately

2011-04-05T14:04:00.000-07:00

We've been busy lately. Ethan decided that he wanted to cut his hair. We went to a hair stylist downtown.

Ethan and Esther looked at lots of styles.
He picked one out and the stylist was happy to get to work. Even after the first big cut, Ethan was pleased with his decision.Ethan was totally pleased with his decision!

We also ate some MREs we've had since Katrina. Those things don't ever go bad.

We also had Backwards Day when we eat all the meals i reverse of the typical order and the food is all made from sweets. For dessert/breakfast we had starter pots (chocolate cupcakes).

For dinner/lunch we had hamburgers and fries (made from sweet biscuits and chocolate brownies).

We haven't done breakfast/dinner yet because Ryan got strep throat, but I know it'll be great. (No spoilers.)

There's nothing wrong with having fun

2011-02-28T19:22:00.000-08:00

I was talking with a customer at a show this past weekend and the subject of TV came up. I told some amusing story about Ryan and his love of WWII documentaries. The woman commented, "At least he isn't playing video games all day." I smiled, and she left. Her comment, however, stayed with me.

I thought about what she said. I thought I should have told her that Ethan spends a great deal of time playing games on the computer. I thought I should have told her that there is nothing wrong with playing video games all day. There is nothing wrong with watching TV all day. There is value in everything, but society doesn't seem to think there is value in children using these things for entertainment, or learning, or fun. Mostly, though, I wondered why I was thinking about her at all.

I know that my guys are happy. I know they are learning and growing. I know that computers, TV, and video games are tools people to get things we need and like. Still, I felt that I ought to have said these things. Part of that is my desire to share how wonderful Unschooling is for us. Part of it is my own to justify myself and my life to other people. The former is something I think is something worth keeping. The latter is something I am learning to let go.

People have a right to learn and live in ways that make sense to them. That is what the first was about. It stemmed from a belief I have always had. Many times, other people try to enforce their views of what constitutes the best ways to live and learn on other people, especially children.

Both of my sons have gotten a great deal from TV and computers. First and foremost, they have gotten enjoyment from them. Electronics have made them smile and laugh. Not incidentally, they have both learned a great deal from their electronics. I think they have learned more from TV and computers because they enjoy using them. They aren't forced to watch things that are educational. They watch what they want and take away insights from what they see. I'm glad they can spend their days watching TV and playing video games if that's what they want to do.

I wish my customer could get as much out of TV and games as my guys do. If she did, I bet she'd have a lot of things to think about instead of focusing on what other people are doing.

Katrina

2010-11-23T10:23:00.000-08:00

I avoided the 5th anniversary hoopla about Katrina. I avoid most coverage of Katrina. I don't often think about it except the sort of once-removed way of wanting the house to sell. Jo brought up an article from the Tampa Times that her mother cut out for us. It was one of those 5th anniversary articles. I had no intention of reading it.

It ended up on top of the bathroom reading pile. It was one of those articles: "Unbowed, Unbroken". I put it down. The lead photo was one of a woman pushing her elderly mother in a wheel chair through the flood water. I picked it up again. I read the short blips about the musician, the hero, the children. I remembered why I don't read things about Katrina. Instead of really dealing with the issues, the media sets up archetypes to represent what it wants to find in the story of flood.

I don't see myself or my family in these stories. They are like myths meant to teach something but not meant to be lived in day-to-day life. I live in a very daily world. I do the laundry, pay the bills, and hang out with my children. I don't dwell on the flood. I know that I survived it and that it made a demarcation line in my life: Before the Katrina/After the Katrina. Before Katrina, I thought I would stay in New Orleans. After Katrina, I knew that wasn't going to happen. It wasn't that it was impossible. I could have gone back, figured out a way to make a living, and gone on with my life. I didn't do that because it was too unstable and unsettling for Ethan and Ryan.

New Orleans became a place that would always be associated with danger. What if it happened again? What if the patched levees didn't hold? How could feel safe? No place is really safe. Life involves risk. Those are cliches. I fall back on them when I try to understand my world in a context that makes some sense. Katrina did not make sense. The hurricane itself did very little damage to our house. The flood was what hurt it. The water flowed into the spaces of lives we try to keep warm and dry. It made Ethan worry about the heavy rain in springtime and made Ryan want everything recreated exactly the way had been in New Orleans. It made me think that having a land-line would somehow signal the return of normalcy.

We never returned to that version of normal. We moved passed being "the hurricane family" and have become something new. Katrina is still here. When people ask how long we've lived in Connecticut or what brought us here, Katrina reappears. I might not mention it. I might gloss over it, but in my head, it comes back. The sequence of events that led up to up, the summer full of hurricanes, the evacuation, Florida, buying this house, trying to reproduce the way things were in New Orleans, the friends that have scattered across the country, and a hundred vignettes of things that happened dance through my brain even if my mouth is saying, "We came up from New Orleans and decided to settled in Connecticut."

I read the article and put it back on the top of the reading pile. I tried to calm the swirl of thoughts. I want the house to sell. I want the comfort of being able to say, "Well, now that the house is sold Katrina is finally over." I know that selling the house is just another event, it won't erase what happened, but I want to be one more step removed from water that lives in the back of my mind.

Kids Deserve Better

2010-10-19T18:54:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking for days about how to write about the current rash of suicides by young people who were GLBTQ or who were accused of being GLBTQ. Many people have talked publicly about how bullying contributed to these deaths. Many people. both straight and queer have said "It gets better. Just hang on." In fact, this seems to be the preferred answer to the problem. If queer kids can just get through those tough tween and teen years, then life will improve. They will find community and acceptance. They will grow into happy adults. After all, they have their whole lives ahead of them.

I find this answer unsatisfactory, distasteful, and wrong. How can we expect people who are told throughout their youth that they are less then everyone else to grow into adults who can suddenly find joy in themselves and their own sexuality? How is it fair that we ask queer kids to "just hang on"? Doesn't every child, and every adult for that matter, deserve to be accepted for who s/he is and deserve a life that is satisfying, even joyful, no matter his/her age, or race, or gender identity, or sexual orientation, or first language, or any other of a laundry list of differences perceived or inherent?

We, as a society, are responsible for their deaths just as much as the kids who bullied them. Is it fair of President Obama to say that gay marriage is an issue that is best left up to the states and that "don't ask, don't tell" ought to be repealed by Congress and that he intends to appeal the legal decision striking down a failed policy? What message is he sending to queer kids? Why aren't people across the country asking our president to stand up for our children?

Queer kids are being failed at school, at home, in their neighborhoods, and in the country at large. As a queer teenager, I knew that I could never go home to my parents and tell them the abuses I suffered. I knew that whatever happened at school or in the neighborhood, I was on my own. If parents, teachers, neighbors, all people who come in contact with queer kids treated them with respect, there would be places for kids to talk and to get advice and help. As it stands now, kids are left to figure things out and cope as best as they can until that magical moment when it "gets better".

What hope are we offering them that it really gets better beyond the pointless assurance that it will? Kids aren't stupid. They see the president saying that he won't help them. They hear their teachers framing issues in terms of straight relationships. They read the textbooks, the teen literature, the adult literature in which they just don't appear. They know the song proclaiming "I kissed a girl and I liked it" is controversial because the singer is female. They see people on the street and in the news holding up signs that read: "God made Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve" or "Fags: Get AIDS and Die!" They know that who they are is at odds with who society wants them to be and they know that no amount of time will make them any more acceptable to a society that sees queers as less than.

GLBTQ kids deserve better. All kids deserve better. They deserve a society that says "It will get better because we are committed to making it better." Sadly, they have a society that prefers platitudes to action and that would rather put the blame on other kids than on itself.

What have you guys been doing?!

2010-09-25T08:33:00.000-07:00

We've been doing lots of fun stuff lately. I guess that's one reason I have so neglected this blog. Of course we've been in lots of water. In August we met Faith, Easy, Malila, and Zola at Riis Park in Brooklyn.

Sitting in chairs: Esther & Malila

Sitting on a Towel: Ryan & Easy

Ethan had a really great time talking with Malila.At the end of August, we went to the Northeast Unschooling Conference in Massachusetts. We hung out with friends.

Drue and Ethan

We got tattoos.

We laughed...a lot!

Drue (Standing) Declan (Pointing) Ethan (Sitting) Ryan (Standing on a chair)

We even played some of our favorite board games.

We had sleepovers and even slept at some of them!

Ryan (Left bed) Amory (Sleeping bag next the right bed)
Doran (Right bed) Ethan (Sleeping bag in the foreground)

We tried out new pools like the one at the newly opened Shoreline Y.

Mimi, Ethan, and Doran

We had a visit from Aunt Kathie.

We tried out chocolate fondue. Doran wasn't as fond of it as everyone else. He enjoyed eating the fruit without dipping it.

Ryan, Ethan, Amory, & Doran

We went to Madison Square Park in NYC and then went to see the King Tut exhibit.

Ryan asked to have his picture taken on top of the tire swing structure.

Ethan on the tire swing.

For my birthday, Ethan made me chocolate brownies! He and Ryan lit the candles. Afterward Ryan had a blast re-lighting a candle and blowing it out until it became nothing more than a stub.

We've been having amazing sunsets here lately. This is one we saw from the top of East Rock.

East Rock has been Ryan's favorite place lately. He loves building cities in the sand pit and being buried up to his neck.

So, that's a little of what has occupied out time lately. Now it's time for me to go play with Ryan.

2010-06-29T11:16:00.000-07:00

So much has been happening that I hardly have time to enjoy it all! Ethan turned 10 in May and this month Ryan turned 7. Mimi made him a Light Saber cake.

He lit the candles himself.

We ate pizza at Pepe's and Ryan got Silly Banz from Ethan.

Ethan got his first stripe on his blue belt in Kung Fu, and we've been to the beach, and hiking, and playgroups. Today we painted with popsicle sticks.

Life is good and full and just living it right now seems to take up every waking moment. I think this is the best thing really: Living without having to stop, going to sleep, waking up and starting all over again.

Water Park, Computers, and Snow!

2010-02-16T12:22:00.001-08:00

Wow it's been a long time since I wrote here. Guess I've been too busy enjoying life to write about it. We just got back from the UWWG.That was big fun.

Ryan loved the sword fight and the endless games of chase.
He enjoyed reconnecting with friends (Jared is on the right) and making new ones (Jet is on the left).
Ethan had a blast selling and trading Pokémon cards with Aryn and Evan.
Ethan really wants to learn to surf. We thought this would be a perfect place to try it out, but he absolutely hated the flow-rider. He said it was too fast and too scary.
After he tried it out, cried, and calmed down he said, "I'm really proud of myself for trying that." Way to go Ethan.

We left the Water park on Friday and arrived home Saturday to a visit from two wonderful friends. Doran and Amory are here for the week. They arrived just in time for Ethan to get his long awaited holiday present. He wanted a laptop and used all his Christmas/Hanukkah/Solstice money to get it. He waited until we could find one in his budget that met his needs. That finally happened yesterday. He was so excited. He and Doran opened the box together.
Mimi helped get it all set up.
Ethan hasn't been off it for long since.
Today we have lots of snow. Doran wanted to go play in it, but was having trouble convincing the other guys to go out. I suggested we could cover him in snow without leaving the house. Ethan leaned out the back window and shoveled the snow from the overhang. All Doran had to do was wait. It was Ethan's idea of perfect snow fun. He got to cover someone in snow without going outside.

Now we're setting up all the computers in the house so that all four guys can play Wizard101 together.

Children and the Politics of Dinner

2009-11-12T15:44:00.000-08:00

The first time I encountered bigotry centered around what one of my children ate and where and how he ate it was when Ethan was an infant. Mimi and I were in the food court at the mall. While she got us some food, I pulled up my shirt and started feeding Ethan. A woman glared at me. I smiled. When Mimi arrived with the food, we began to eat. The woman stalked over to the table and said, "Can't you do that in the women's room?" Mimi stood up and told her, "He is not going to eat lunch in a bathroom stall. Are you?" The woman went back to her table, gathered her things and left.

That was first time we had a stranger tell us and our sons how and where to enjoy their meals. It wasn't the last time. On more than one occasion I've had strangers in restaurants complain to me about Ethan and Ryan's behavior. Sometimes they had legitimate concerns. Most times, however, they complain about things that really aren't issues in our world: "Your child is standing by the window." "Are those your sons looking at the fish?" and my personal favorite "Did you know your children are playing under your table?" (For the record, yes, I am aware of where the guys are and what they are doing, and yes, I am ready to intervene if they are underfoot.)

I just finished reading an entry in Raising My Boychick in which Arwyn addresses this issue. After reading her take on it, I want to have cards printed with the following excerpts from her blog and hand one to the next person who says, "Are you sure it's alright for your kids to eat standing up?"

I recently ran across a piece of child-hate (no, I’m not telling you where) that said, in part, “Sure, I think children are people, but their parents need to make sure they act like it in public! People in restaurants don’t crawl on the floor or dance between the tables!” Really? Because I’m pretty sure what you were talking about just then was a person who was, in fact, dancing between the empty tables.

This is but one example of the widespread phenomenon of child-hate disguised as simply a “concerned citizen”: children are OK in public, as long as they don’t in any way attract an adult’s attention. It usually comes with a hefty dose of mother-blame (which is a type of misogyny, remember), in the form of “she should control her kids, or keep them at home!”

When the parent-blaming child-shaming folk say “I treat kids like people by expecting them to act like it” what they’re really saying is “I expect kids to act like adults”, which boils down to the belief that only adults are people. Because if you actually recognize that children are in fact persons, then you would be able to see that yes, actually, people do do those things in public, and the proof is dancing right in front of you.

What does it mean, exactly, to honor their personhood? It means simply that we start with the radical idea that children are people: that they have the right to bodily integrity; that their needs are no less important than ours, that their desires are no less worthy than ours; that their feelings matter, that their ideas matter, that they matter; that they should be respected for who they are, not just valued (or devalued) for what they do for us.

So that child, dancing in the aisle while you are dining? Their personhood means they have just as much right to be there as you do. If they are unreasonably blocking the way, or damaging property, or causing such a commotion that no other patron is able to also be comfortable in that space — in other words, if they are actually doing something objectively objectionable — then of course you have a cause to complain. And perhaps that was the case in the original screed I read: I cannot know. But regardless, if in the course of your complaint, no matter how legitimate, you state that children need to act like adults (especially using the code word “people”) or not be allowed out in public? If your objection is, at its base, that they are a child in public, daring to act like a child? Then you are an anti-child bigot, and you are the problem in that restaurant that needs to be sent home until you can act like a person.

I have no illusion that the person who receives the card will read it or take it heart, but if only one person reads it and realizes that rather than expressing concern s/he is, in fact, trying to control Ethan and Ryan and me than it will be well worth the effort. All children deserve the right to go out in public without having to act exactly the way people around believe "a child" ought to behave.

Tractors, Tino, and the Trapeze

2009-09-19T19:13:00.000-07:00

To celebrate my birthday, and because it's just big fun, we all went to the Guilford Fair today. Ethan an I snuggled while watching the tractor pulls.
Then he and Ryan had fun with Mimi.
Mama Jeanne really got into the tractors.
This kid won first in his division.
One of the cool things about the Guilford Fair is that the Flying Wallendas perform there. (Yes, The Flying Wallendas like in the movie.) Today Tino Wallenda walked across a wire strung 70 feet above the ground. The speck to the left of the sun is Tino.
He also did a head stand. That was very cool.
The Flying Cortes performed on the trapeze.
That act had Ryan mesmerized.

Ethan really liked the round-up ride.
At one point Ryan asked for a corn dog. Mama Jeanne tried to find one, but failed. Could there really be a fair with no corn dogs?
I didn't think so. Mimi had corn dog magic and found one for him.

Ryan made friends with a donkey.
Both guys liked the inflated slide.
It was a full good day. We stayed for hours looking at the exhibits and the livestock. We said hello to the llamas, the cows, the sheep, the chickens, the rabbits, and the goats. We even got to see a cow getting her hooves cleaned and her swollen foot bandaged.

Eventually though, Ethan got tired, sat down at a table near the sheep, and went to sleep,
so we gathered him up and headed home.

Ethan and Mimi Clean His Room

2009-09-14T11:10:00.000-07:00

Ethan asked for help cleaning his room, so Mimi made a date with him to work on it today. They have been at all day except for a few breaks. I suggested that Ethan could use an old shelf resting on some cinder blocks to add more room for books under his desk. That was the last step, and while they sorting the books, Mimi asked Ethan if he wanted his red chest to live under the Lego table or to go back under the window where it has been living.

Ethan: It's OK there now. I'm too tired to move it.

Mimi: Want me to move it?

Ethan: Um...

Mimi: Do you want it under the window?

Ethan: I don't want to move it.

Ba: If it could magically go anywhere, where would it go?

Ethan: Floating in mid-air. *Very Big Grin*

Ryan's Tooth

2009-09-05T19:20:00.000-07:00

Ryan lost his first yesterday. We were in the car when he announced "My tooth is half un-tached!" Not 20 minutes later he yelled "My tooth came out! Here it is!" and promptly dropped it in the car where it immediately disappeared. We stopped the car and spent 30 minutes trying to find the tooth but could not. We assured him that all was well and that the Tooth Fairy would bring a dollar even if there was no tooth under his pillow. Ethan was so sweet. He reassured Ryan that the Tooth Fairy would come and even offered to help write a note explaining the situation to said fairy.

He is so cute with the little gap in his mouth. He lost the left bottom front one, so it's not incredibly visible, but when he smiles one of his really big smiles you can see it. Mimi and Ba went to the bookstore to get him a tooth fairy book, but, alas, none of them had little tooth pouches like the one we got for Ethan. No matter, we got a Charlie and Lola book in which Lola's tooth both falls out and is promptly lost, just like Ryan's. The Tooth Fairy brought Lola a coin, and this morning there was a dollar under Ryan's pillow.

So, Ryan has one less baby tooth, but one more dollar, and he is glad that he can once again eat whatever wants with having to be careful of a loose tooth.

A Few Ryan-isms

2009-09-05T19:09:00.000-07:00

Spydentity (n): The secret name that one spy calls another. Also the real identity of any spy, although the real name and spy name rarely match.

"I'm going to pick up it." (This one has the grown-ups now using that word order.)

"My sore is throat." (Given as a reason for having a beverage close at hand.)

Toxinate (v): What happens when poison gas is let into the room. This is generally done by "bad guys" and/or "evil spys". as a noun: toxination

"My tooth is half un-tached!" (Actually, that tooth is now completely unattached.)

Elseplace (n): Some place which is ot the place you are currently occupying.

"I am starving hungry! Thus, you will make me breakfast."

Agents (n): Very old people or groups such as the Spartans or the Ancient Romans

Scientific Tickling

2009-08-25T12:51:00.000-07:00

Ryan came to wake me up one day and tried to get up out of bed immediately by tickling my armpits. He soon found out that I am not ticklish there. He proceeded to check other places to find my "tickliness". I told him that I am not ticklish, but he kept checking. By the time he got to my feet, I found the whole adventure so funny that I was already laughing. Once he touched me feet, I burst into peels of laughter. "That proves it!" he yelled. "Ba has tickliness!"

Next he went to Mimi and tried tickling her armpits. She didn't laugh. He moved all the way down to her feet. By the time he got to her feet she was laughing out loud. "Mimi has tickliness, too!" he cried.

"Who is more ticklish, Ba or Mimi?" she asked him.

"I need to experiment," he answered. He proceeded to tickle each of us until we were laughing so hard we asked him to stop. He could barely breathe himself he was laughing so hard. "Ba can't not laugh, so that proves she has more tickliness than Mimi" was his verdict.

Now he comes in every morning and wakes us up by checking for our tickliness. Today he decided to see which was more "tickly" tickling with his fingers or blowing raspberries on our feet. "Now hold still," he instructed. "This is very important. If you move you can ruin my whole experiment." He tickled each way. By the time he blew raspberries on the soles of my feet I was laughing and squirming and pulled my feet away. I accidently kicked him. "Hey you kicked me!" he yelled.

"I'm sorry Ryan, but if you tickle my feet I might jerk away."

"Right. OK." He pretended to write on a pad. "Note: Be careful when preforming tickliness experiments."

"You are definately more tickly, Ba. Mimi doesn't kick me."

I guess I am. After all, you can't argue with rigorous scientific testing.

Breaking Things

2009-08-17T14:00:00.000-07:00

Not too long ago, Ethan threw Ryan's favorite Planet Hero figure (Zip) from the second story window. It broke. There was upset all around. After things calmed down, I asked Ethan why he threw Zip from the window, and he said he just wanted to see something break. I told him that we could do that in a way that wouldn't involve any one's treasured things and wouldn't hurt any one's feelings. I wasn't sure how that would look, but I knew we could do it.

We stopped at Goodwill one day to check out the books and I found ceramic cups and mugs for ten cents each. I bought them and brought them home. Today we pout a tarp outside the front windows and dropped about a dozen ceramic cups, two mugs, and the remains of one broken bowl we had in the house from the front windows. Ethan was thrilled! He and Ryan had a blast dropping them, retrieving them, and dropping them again.

It was one of those moments when it was just easy to step outside the box. I love those moments.

Travels and Friends

2009-08-10T17:31:00.000-07:00

We've been very busy for the past few weeks. We went on a trip which started out in Plymouth, MA at an Unschooler's Camp Out. Where Ryan met a new friend, Mauve, and found she shared his love of sticks.

Ethan, Declan, and Will discovered a sunny place to relax.

I managed to get all the kids in one photo. This was Ryan's fire, but he decided to share. He built lots of fires on this trip and learned "black smithing" which is, apparently, the art of blacking one end of stick so that it can be used to write on rocks.
Next we went to Grammy's cabin in NH. The fun with fire theme continued there. Grammy liked the fires.
Ethan built his first fire with a little help from Ryan and Mimi.
~~In honor of~~ In spite of it being Learn Nothing Day, Uncle Gareth showed Ethan a how to use a bow and arrows.
Mimi and Ba took the guys for a canoe ride. Of course anyone can ride in the canoe. It's much more challenging to get pulled along in an inner tube.
Ethan spent hours following the ducks in the pond. He quacked at them and they were very accommodating. He got really close to them. After a few hours, he announced that being a duck was great, but without feathers it gets pretty cold even if the lake is warm.

Water always looms large in our family, so went to Jacob Riis Park last Tuesday and caught some gnarly waves.
There were a few wipe outs, but both Ethan and Ryan are ready to go again tomorrow. They say this is the best beach in the world. I have to agree. It has been my favorite beach since childhood.
Amazing water fun continued at Jean's wonderful potluck. The food was yummy and there lots of cool unschoolers. Jean lives mere blocks from the ocean, so naturally, everyone headed there for an afternoon swim. It was a great time to catch up with friends, old and new.
I couldn't resist posting in this photo of Kim. Gotta love a girl who knows what to take to the beach.
Finally, we went to see the new Harry Potter movie on Sunday. Ethan wanted to wait to see it at an Imax with Ryan, all 3 mommies, Aunt Jo, and Uncle Joe. We met up in New Rochelle, NY and while we were walking to the theater, Ethan decided to pause to let Wolverine hang on a tree.
All in all, a very satisfying and refreshing few weeks.

What do you do all day?

2009-07-12T17:37:00.000-07:00

Well, I guess that all depends on the day. Most days start with some television: Sponge Bob and Star Wars: The Clone Wars, and then there's some DS playing. Both Ethan and Ryan like some quiet time when they wake up. Getting up going anywhere only happens when there's something we really want or have to do and can't put later in the day. After that, some breakfast is in order. Once all that is done, the day is wide open.

We might want to get dressed.

There might be an aluminum foil ice storm.
It could turn out to be day that calls out for body art.
Some days we go to kids' museums, like Kidcity with friends. In this case we went with Gabe and Justin. Ethan likes to keep things in balance.
Ryan is more into getting a different perspective.
We go to festivals, like the Arts and Ideas Festival in New Haven. I'm not sure if this counts as art, ideas, or both.

It's a safe bet that some of our days will include lots of water fun, like going to an indoor water park.

If it's your birthday and you are finally six years old, you could have a celebratory light saber fight with your brother.
Or you just just kick back at Ba's desk and watch some Star Wars videos on YouTube.
There has a been a lot woodchuck trap and release happening lately which looks like this:

This one wasn't the brightest of the 7 we caught. It took him a while to figure out how to get into the woods by going under the plastic fencing.We might even go to see the mayor during his monthly Mayor's Night In and get to sit on the special mayoral couch.
We unschool. Every day is its own adventure.

Unschooling Epistemology

2009-06-13T16:55:00.000-07:00

The other day I was trying to make a point while talking with Ethan. I tapped his knee and said, "Did I tap your knee?"

Ethan: "I dunno. Maybe."

Me: " I did Ethan. You *saw* me do it."

Ethan: "Maybe it wasn't you."

Me: "Ethan, really, it was me. I'm the only person who could have done it."

Ethan: "No you're not. Maybe a ghost did it."

Me: "A ghost?"

Ethan: "Right. There's lots of things we don't know and can't prove and you can't say for sure that there aren't ghosts. Maybe one just controlled your hand and tapped my knee."

Me: "Ummm. OK, but I know I did it."

Ethan: "At least you think you know you did."

I love the way his mind works.

April Fools' Day Fun

2009-04-11T19:48:00.000-07:00

April 1st is Backwards Day at our house. We take the traditional meal order and change it around. This year, Mimi and Ba decided to take the opportunity to play with our food. So, all the food presented at mealtimes was made from candy or had candy as an ingredient.

Our first meal was desert. It helps to wake up and the day started with a nice helping of dirt (cake) complete with (gummy) worms.

And if you have dirt for breakfast, you have to eat it without benefit of utensils.

After that we ate our dinner. Ba and Mimi love sushi, so we made some for lunch. We invited Ethan and Ryan to come sample our Japanese restaurant. This one fooled them for a second to two, but they soon realized the sushi was krispie treats, gummies, and fruit roll-ups.

Breakfast also required candle light. Ryan really enjoyed that part of lunch, even if he only liked the krispie treat part of the sushi.

The eggs were fluff and lemon jell-o and there was grill cheese sandwiches made from pound cake toast with yellow-colored icing as cheese and laffy-taffy flattened out and rounded into a tomato slice. The mango juice was colored milk. This one didn't fool them at all. We thought they would really like the fluff, but neither of them could stand it. They immediately asked for real eggs instead. Ethan said, "If I eat one more bite of candy I'll barf." Can't have that on a holiday! So we had real eggs for breakfast with real OJ and mango-colored milk chasers.

All this talk of eggs brings me to another egg look alike from the day. During his bath, Ryan asked for a balloon to fill with water. He filled this so full, we couldn't lift it out of the water. Sitting there, in the soapy water, it looks like, well, like an egg.

Such is life on backward day. Nothing is what it seems.

In Other News

2009-04-11T19:34:00.000-07:00

After the hurricane, I really wanted a phone. A phone with a cord that attached to the wall of a house that we owned. I wanted a number that said "This is where we live." I wanted an area code that didn't fritz out because the lines were all wonky because the water screwed up everything including the towers that beamed the transmissions into outer space. When we bought this house, I got just that. I got 203-535-0014. It was good. It was comforting. It attached to a wall and had 3 extensions.

It also has a ghost. Her name is Dawn Ricatelli. The phone almost never brought calls from friends, like the one in New Orleans. It brought mostly mechanical voices saying "This is for [pause] Dawn Ricatelli." Sometimes it brought an old woman's voice saying, "Dawnie? Dawnie pick up it's me! Are you there? Call me." I called the voice once, but she wouldn't talk to me. "Stop calling. I don't know you." Or she would whistle. She has a loud piercing whistle. I stopped trying to tell her that Dawn wasn't at this number anymore. I tried to tell her it was just a number to a house with some people she didn't know. It didn't work. Dawn owes a lot of people money. The ghost in the phone number doesn't seem to care. She lets the phone ring and waits for me or the answering machine to handle things for her.

The phone also has a price tag. In this case it costs about $50.00 a month. I am tired of paying money to AT&T. I want $50.00 for movies and books and fun things, so today, I sent Dawn and the number away. Now, I just have a cell phone. It still has a 504 area code. It says, "You are from New Orleans. You are carrying a piece of the past and can use it talk to the future." That's a pretty cool idea. It also says, "You are hip and cutting edge. You are in the 21st century." That's pretty cool, too. Still, it's strange not to have a land line. It's odd to know that no one can call when I'm not home, and wait for the beep, and leave a message for me to find at some future date. Now if they get a message, it's because I haven't charged my cell phone or haven't answered it, or am driving, or ignoring it. Overall though, it means I am free of the ghost of today and can rely on older ghosts which have proven themselves come hell or high water.

Glasses, but not rose-colored

2009-03-06T18:57:00.001-08:00

Over the past year I've noticed that Ryan sits very close to the TV, holds the DS close to his face, and when I asked about a picture a few feet away, he said he couldn't read the letters. When he went for his annual checkup last Spring, he didn't want to read the letter chart for the eye exam. The pediatrician suggested we go to a pediatric ophthalmologist. She thought Ryan might feel comfortable having the exam there. That didn't fly at all. Ryan didn't want to go, but said he would check it out. He told the doctor to stay away while he explored the chair and the equipment. She tried to examine him. He kicked her, hard. We left. Even after he calmed down, he had no interest in ever going back. He explained to us that since she was a doctor and since doctors give shots, she was going to give him a shot. We told him that we had never heard of an eye doctor giving a shot during an exam, but he said, "Eye doctor, doctor. Doctor shot. Duh."

When he found out that Esther and I were getting eye exams, he said he would go. We told him he could decide to leave at any time, and asked him to just say he wanted to go instead of kicking the doctor. So, off we went. He brought his DS and played it in the waiting room. He watched me get examined and then hopped up in the chair. I asked the nurse to use the picture chart since he is not as comfortable with letters as he is with pictures, but she refused. He couldn't see anymore than the first line of the chart. The nurse then announced that he would need to get his eyes dilated. I asked if the drops hurt and she said yes. Ryan said, "I'm out of here," but stayed in the chair. Esther and I offered to have him sit on one of our laps or hold our hands, but he didn't to do that. The nurse told us to hold his arms. We refused. She said he has to have this. While she was talking (over him) he was saying that he would do it in few minutes. The nurse was really rude.

Nurse: "You really should just hold him."
Ba: "Ryan do you want to try the drops?"
Ryan: "OK, just wait a minute. Can I have a tissue?"
Ba: "Sure."
Nurse: "He's a child just hold him."
Ba and Mimi in unison: "He's a person."
Nurse: "Right, but he's still a child. He doesn't know-"
Ba and Mimi: "He's a person."
Ryan: "OK, you can do it now. I"m ready now."

He was really brave. The drops stung a lot. The worst part of all this, aside from the clueless nurse, was that the drops didn't get into his left eye and he had to get them again. The second time a different nurse did it. She was patient and attentive to him. She waited until he was ready and stood back and gave him lots of room. She gave all the tissues he wanted and sympathized with him. She brought him Ironman stickers immediately after giving him the drops. He threw them on the floor and called them stupid, but he liked them later.

The ophthalmologist was very nice and patient. He said Ryan's vision is 20/50, but he didn't want to try Ryan's patience by working out a prescription today. He asked if Ryan had been to the pediatric ophthalmologist, and when we told him what happened there, he was understanding and said he could figure out he prescription himself. We have an appointment three weeks hence. He promised Ryan that he wouldn't need drops at that appointment and that he and Ryan would "play with [his] glasses." Ryan psyched about going back because he and Mimi will get to pick out frames together. I have no clue whether or not he'll actually wear the glasses, but we'll get two pairs of glasses and see what happens. Hopefully he'll use them, be able to see more clearly, and enjoy things more.

One Wind Turbine, One Wind Mill, and One Happy Mardi Gras

2009-02-24T17:47:00.001-08:00

Last month we trekked over to Rhode Island and saw Lewis & Clark: Great Journey West at the IMAX in Providence. It was Ethan's and Ryan's first time to an IMAX, and they were alternately thrilled and confused. Watching Ethan react to the feel of the buffalo, looking around to try to find what was making that thunderous sound, and then exclaiming "What are those?!" while pointing at the screen was the closest I'll ever come to seeing how non-natives in the Lewis & Clark party reacted to them.

On the way there and on the way back, we were discussing one of Ethan's current favorite topics: alternative energy. On the way home, we took a scenic route down along the coast of Rhode Island (the island on which Newport is located as opposed to the other islands or the mainland). Ethan wanted to know about wind power, and lo and behold it appeared, looming above the horizon: a wind turbine. It was not too far from the road we were on, so, of course, we detoured. We found Portsmouth Abby in Portsmouth, RI. On the grounds there is a wind turbine next a parking lot on a western slope.

It is really massive, but very quiet. Here is a photo of Ethan and the turbine so you can see how big it really is:
Ethan was a little intimidated by it, so he didn't go all the way up to it. I didn't either since I wasn't wearing boots and didn't want cold wet feet for the rest of the drive. Ryan felt the cold wind when the car door opened and announced, "I can see it just fine from here, thanks."

Ethan kept calling the turbine a windmill. We explained to him that they were two different devices, but he just couldn't remember the two terms and used them interchangeably. While we talking about the differences, as if the universe hadn't provided enough adventure for one day, (Is there even such a thing as enough adventure?), we came across a windmill. This one is in Middleton, RI at the Windmill View Cottage.

Ethan was surprised at how small it was when compared to the turbine.

I didn't get to see the actual windmill. I was going to trek across the field even if I would get cold wet feet, but Ryan really didn't want to leave the car even if I carried him. So, I read while Ryan played DS and Ethan and Esther set out to learn about the windmill and get some photos.

I can't end this post without noting that today is Mardi Gras. It may just another Tuesday for most of you, but in our house, it's a holiday. I meant to order a King Cake, but I didn't get to it this year. Next year, though, there's one with cream cheese filling calling my name.

Evidence of Learning (Not what you think)

2009-02-13T19:18:00.000-08:00

Three amazing things have happened in the past two days.

Thing one:
Ryan came in the kitchen and asked for tin foil. I gave him the roll we have that is out of the box and therefore doesn't have the serrated cutting edge. He took some and tried to wrap it around his leg. "I'm getting on my armor," he explained.

"That's great. You know," I started to tell him that he'd a need longer piece of foil to get it around his leg, but stopped myself. He crumpled up the piece, put it on the table and began adding more and more and more foil it making a big ball. I thought that he was using a lot of foil. "So, what are you making?" I asked carefully not saying that he had a lot more tin foil than I thought he would use.

"It's a boulder! It's going to fall down and then - wait! Like this see?" He dropped to the floor and pulled the foil ball onto his leg. "It falls on the guy like this and his leg is caught like this." Ryan began to squirm around the floor miming someone with a stuck leg. "But don't panic! He gets out when his friends come and help him." Then he took the ball of tin foil and ran back to his Rescue Hero guys.

Thing two:
Ryan asked me to get the markers so he could draw. (Side note: I can't wait until the craft room is re-arranged and he can get them all by himself. That will make him happy.) I got them and he sat at the table while Ethan, Esther, Jo, and I played Scrabble. I looked up and saw him coloring all over himself with marker. He looked like he had blue snot running down his face. I laughed and told him to go look in the mirror at how cool it was. So did everyone else.

Thing Three:
Ryan and Ethan were in the bathtub tonight getting water everywhere and drinking bathwater and spitting it out toasting anything they could think of toasting. Esther went in and put towels on the floor so the flood waters were somewhat contained. I thought it was great that they were having such a good time.

It occurred to me this evening that none of those things were problems. Tin foil just isn't that expensive and he really can't use "too much". I know where the store is located. Not only that, but I needn't tell anyone the obvious. I can trust my kids to see for themselves when they don't have enough tin foil to wrap around their legs. Non-toxic marker all over Ryan's face and body is just marker and it it doesn't mean people will look at me like there's something wrong with me for letting him draw on himself, and if they do, then that's their issue. Yes, flooding the bathroom will make the floor really wet and someone might trip and get hurt, but if towels get put down, it doesn't matter.

See? I can learn. I have three pieces of evidence.

All this time I thought we had a dog

2009-01-15T18:27:00.000-08:00

Ethan and Ryan were playing with their light sabers this morning. Ethan was feeding lines to Ryan to advance the plot. Ryan was following as closely as he could.

Ethan: Now say, "I bear sole responsibility for my actions."

Ryan: I am responsible for the bear.

Ethan: Not quite.

Cream Cheese and Cookies

2008-12-13T18:04:00.000-08:00

Ethan and Ryan spent the morning playing a game which involved using empty cream cheese boxes as communicators. They opened up both ends of the boxes and put them on their arms. At one point, Ryan couldn't find his box. I emptied the butter out it's box and offered him that one, but it didn't have the right constellation of pictures, so I searched the house and eventually found the missing cream cheese box in the recycle bin.

Carrie and her kids came over for playtime and cookie-making in the afternoon. Ethan was still wearing the cream cheese box when Carrie got here. She asked him "So, what's that on your arm? A ray-gun?" Ethan just rolled his eyes and very slowly and clearly told her "It's a Cream. Cheese. Box." He cracks me up. Carrie and Esther cracked up too. Quinten (Carrie's oldest) looked puzzled and said, "What's so funny?" We told him, but I don't think he thought it was funny.

The Ethan, Quinten, Chloe, and Ryan immediately headed out into the backyard, despite the 20-degree weather. They jumped on the trampoline and played with foam swords. Carma elected to stay in the warm house and color and help bake cookies. She really liked making the batter, but wasn't too into cutting out cookies shapes. Instead she climbed up to my shoulders and did back flips. The older kids came in to help decorate and eat cookies.

It was a really relaxing fun day. I love having friends come over.

Tummy Crummies and Flu Vaccines

2008-11-28T19:55:00.000-08:00

We talked to Ethan and Ryan last month about getting flu shots, and Ethan said he definitely wanted one. Ryan wasn't so sure. We called the pediatrician and were told that they were currently out of doses, but would have more available this month.

In the meantime, Ethan got a horrible stomach virus. He starting vomiting Sunday night and felt crappy into Monday. I started throwing up on Tuesday and still don't feel completely well. Esther got sick on Wednesday and is still under the weather. Ryan threw up once on Wednesday, laid down for about 10 minutes, then leapt up ready to play. Jeanne has, so far, managed not to get sick at all.

All this was not the best lead in to today which was flu shot day for Ethan and Ryan. Ethan was a bit nervous about the whole thing, and Ryan said he wasn't going to get one at all. That was fine. We told them that it was up to them, and they could change their minds right up until we left the doctor's office. When we arrived at the office, the nurse told us that instead of a shot, the guys could get the nasal version. Ethan said he'd take that happily. Ryan said, "I'm getting the shot. I like pain." The nurse dosed Ethan and then drew up Ryan's shot. She wiped his arm with the alcohol and unsheathed the needle. Ryan said, "Never mind. I'll take the nose kind." I was really glad that the whole experience was pain free.

At dinner tonight, we were all talking about our days. Ethan said he got the "nose shot" and that it was "really great." Ryan said, "I had to get the flu nose shot. My boss said all spies need to get one every year. Next year I have to get another one or I can't work anymore."

I have no idea when he decided that being a spy meant getting a flu vaccine. That just goes to show you who is the real spy guy around here.

Kid's Vote

2008-11-04T18:28:00.000-08:00

Isabella Pinto organized her own election. Here's a bit from the Waterbury Republican-American (Connecticut):

Isabella Pinto, 8, was so disappointed to learn she was too young to vote, she organized her own election. The young political junkie and contemporaries from her recently launched Children's Right to Vote Committee on Tuesday will address what they consider an injustice. They will oversee their own presidential election, one open to even those born after iPods first hit store shelves. "It's not fair that we don't get to vote," said Isabella, an aspiring commander-in-chief (and lawyer and scientist) from Thomaston. "People say 'We the people,' and children are people, too."

The rest of the article is here: http://www.rep-am.com/News/376850.txt.

When we told Ethan about this, he said he had to go to Thomaston and vote. It's about an hour drive from New Haven to Thomaston, but that didn't deter him. After Esther and I cast our votes for Obama, we piled into the car and set off for Ethan to vote. Ryan said he was not going to vote because it didn't count anyway. I can understand that.

Ethan was so excited to get to vote for Obama. He said he wanted to vote because Obama was against the war and would help people who don't have a lot of money. He said he thinks it's great that Obama wants to "spread the wealth."

Once we got to Thomaston, Ethan had to register, and get his ballot.

Next he went to the voting table and marked his ballot.

Finally he put his ballot in the ballot box.
He was very happy to get he chance to vote. He even got an I voted today sticker which he put on the calander along side ours.

Lucky for Ethan, he got his election results already:

Presidential Winner: Obama - 66, McCain -53, Nader - 4

Total Voters - 123

Now let's hope the nationwide vote follows this one!

Watching Shrek

2008-10-23T16:42:00.000-07:00

Ethan, Ryan, Mimi, and I were watching Shrek. Sadly, the disk from Netflix froze. While Mimi was trying to get the movie to play again, the following conversation took place:

Ryan: Why did Shrek put on that helmet? He shouldn't have put that on and then she (the princess) wouldn't have yelled at him to take it off.

Ba: Shrek didn't want the princess to know he was an ogre. He didn't want her to be afraid of him.

Ryan: Why are people afraid of ogres?

Ba: In most fairy tales ogres are monsters who eat people -

Ethan (cutting in): Yeah! And drink their body fluids!

Ryan: What are body fluids?

Ethan: Honestly, I have no idea.

My guys crack me up.

End of the Summer Fun

2008-09-29T15:31:00.000-07:00

Our days have been very full lately. I thought August and September would be relatively open months, but they filled up with lots of fun. We cleared out some boxes we had on the third floor and found that we had lots of old financial records we no longer need. We put them in boxes and asked Ethan if he wanted to learn to shred paper. At first he wasn't interested because he was busy on Webkinz. Once he found out it involved a loud machine that wreaked mayhem on hapless sheets of paper he was all over it.
I love the outfit he put together that day. The shirt ("I do all my own stunts") is from his Nan-nan (godmother) and the hat was on its way to Goodwill when he intercepted it. He made the earrings and the necklace himself.

Water still looms large in our activities. Ethan adores going to Hammonasset Beach. I really like this photo of him hanging out there. It was taken on 21 September 2008. We went to the Guilford Fair and Ethan wanted to go to the beach afterward. The water as warm, but the air was too cold for Ba or Mimi to want to get wet. That didn't stop Ethan. Nothing stops Ethan from going into the water. I have no doubt he'd say yes to skinny-dipping in Fargo in February.

Ryan declined to go to the beach. He likes the water well enough, but his passions are his DS and his Webkinz. He's not with his Webkinz here. This time he's sharing his DS secrets with Chiquite. Chiquite is a travelling stuffed monkey. He goes from homeschool house to homeschool house hanging out and having fun.
Ryan is also a big fan of lollipops. We went to the New York Renaissance Faire which is not lacking in the lollipop department.

Chiquite came to the Ren Fest as well. That monkey just cracks Ryan up.

New Hampshire, New Fridge, New Haven

2008-08-02T17:08:00.000-07:00

July was quite the month, but I'm going to start out with today because it's fresh and amusing. Ethan and Ryan stayed home with Mama Jeanne today while Esther and I set out to get a refrigerator. The old downstairs fridge died a horrible death last month and we had no choice but to get a new one. We got an amazing deal since Sears was having a sale and we had a $50 coupon.

While we were in Sears, we got a phone call from Mike Alumni Cruises. We just booked our rooms for the Unschooling Adventure Cruise in October of 2009. In order to talk to him, Esther wanted to sit down. We ducked into the nearest dressing room and sat down in a stall. While she was talking, I listened for a while then looked around the stall. I noticed a very large pair of shorts hanging on a hook.I thought it was odd that they were men's shorts. Then I looked at the other clothing in the stall. It was all men's clothing. She finished the phone call and left. The sales associate outside looked very confused. We just smiled and walked away.

In other news, we spent 10 days in New Hampshire at Kim's cabin. The first two days Esther and I had to work. If you've ever wondered what we really do at work, here's a picture of breakdown. Mike is one of the show producers and the girl pushing him is Georgia, child of one of the other vendors.

Back at the cabin, there was lots of game playing,

and hanging out by the pond.
There was also a day of bowling. We won a free game of ten-pin bowling last year at the Firemen's Auction and cashed it in this year.

We got to spend with Kim and she got to spend time with Croydon.
Ryan loved having s'mores each night. It was even better the night we had the fire, s'mores, sparklers, and fireworks.

Of course all that fun in one night can make you very tired.
Ethan liked getting up early and waiting near the dock for anyone else to get up and go swimming with him.
Both Ethan and Ryan liked having Uncle Stephan's and Uncle Gareth's friends come up. Callen played guitar and that was very cool.

Now we're back in New Haven and looking forward to a day at Lake Compounce on Monday. Right now though, we 're having fun playing Webkinz and Puzzle Pirates.

Gymnastics, Water, and Spy Birthdays

2008-07-02T22:22:00.000-07:00

So, what have we been doing? Well, playing with the digital camera is always involved.

Ethan just finished up his Spring gymnastics session. He has been pre-team since January and is ready to move up to team in the Fall. The problem with this is that the boys who are in his class and who would be his teammates aren't very nice to him. They tease him about having long hair and being home schooled. He mentioned it on and off over the time he's been at this gym, but when I asked him if he wanted to stop going he always said no. Finally a few weeks ago, he started to cry on the way to gymnastics. He said he just didn't want to go. We pulled over and said that was fine. He said he couldn't take the teasing anymore and that there was no one at the gym he liked. We asked about his coach and he told us that he thought the coach was rude and unsympathetic if one of the boys was tired or sore or hurt. We asked him if he still wanted to do gymnastics if we found him a new gym. He said absolutely. We told him how proud we are of him for telling us what was going on and for just being him.

We've since found him a new gym a little further away from the house. He started there today and loves it. The coaches there don't tolerate any name calling or teasing. If it happens, a warning is issued, and ultimately, if it doesn't stop, than the person isn't allowed to attend the gym anymore. Ethan is on the team at his new gym and he was laughing and smling and talking with the other boys during practice yesterday. I never saw him engage with the boys at the previous gym, so this is definitely a step in the right direction.

Other than gymnastics, water has been a theme over the past few weeks. Even if we spend the day at the house, water is involved.

Once a week we go up to Petersen Park in Wolcott to hang out with a group of very cool home schoolers. The park is really neat. It has a small waterfall.
I had never walked up to it even though I'd been going there for weeks. Ethan and Ryan had walked up there with other mommies and kids. They said that in addition to the waterfall, there was a swimming hole. When I walked up there, I was surprised at the rocks and roots in the path. I thought it would be a level flat path like the other ones in the park. It was only about half a mile to the waterfall, but it was a little difficult in some spots. Peg had never walked to the waterfall either. She isn't very sure-footed, so it was great fun walking up there with her and seeing how happy she was to finally get there.

I love how her daughters are looking admiringly at her.

Ethan and Ryan said the water was cold, really cold, but that didn't stop them from going in.

Nikki opted to look at the water instead of going into it.
Along with the waterfall and the swimming hole there is an interesting tree. Piper just fits in it.

We went on a boat ride around the Thimble Islands. It was organized by and for homeschoolers. Ryan and Ethan enjoyed it a lot.

The islands have some amazing houses on them. This one is Cut-In-Two Island.
It was cut into two parts by the 1938 hurricane. Now it joined by a foot bridge.

We've also gone to Lighthouse Point. The water there was too cold for me, but, once again, nothing keeps Ethan and Ryan out of the water.
It helps that a dry towel awaits them when their teeth start to chatter.

Finally, we celebrated Ryan's actual natal day. He wanted to get his family presents the night before his birthday. Who could say no to a birthday eve? He got a lot of spy gear. No surprise there.
All the gear came in a briefcase (a brand new real leather briefcase we got at the thrift store for a dollar) along with the following note:

Important Memo From Spy Headquarters

Super Spy Guy Ryan
Agent Number 12345
25 June 2008

It has come to our attention that you are about to turn 5 years old. You have hereby been promoted to Super Spy. Be careful! Super Spies need to be even sneakier than regular spies.

We have entrusted this case to your mommies. In it you will find several important tools that you will use to be a better spy. Do Not let these items fall into enemy hands. More Super Spy tools will be sent to you next month. Our lab is still testing them.

Happy Birthday and Good Luck!

Highest Chief Super Agent Spy

Oddly, he didn't find the note as amusing as Jeanne, Esther, and I found it. Ah well. He is only 5.

Manhattan and Ryan's Birthday Party

2008-06-14T17:43:00.000-07:00

On Thursday I took Kim to her doctor appointments while Esther got to take Ryan and Ethan as well as their friends Doran and Amory to the top of the Empire State Building. Our guys have been there once before, but it was Doran and Amory's first trip to Manhattan.
They really liked the Subway.
The top of the tall building was cool, too.
Today was Ryan's 5th birthday party. He actually turns 5 ~~on the 25th~~ CLASSIFIED, but no real spy lets anyone know private information. He had said he wanted a spy-themed party, but changed it at the last minute to a Rescue Heroes one. He still got lots of cool spy gear including binoculars hidden in a football and a secret code book with decoder pad.

We made him a Rescue Hero symbol birthday cake.

He got lots of presents.
We had 3 rescue games for everyone to play. First we put a bunch of plastic balls and some crumpled newsprint into a tent along with 2 dozen parachute guys. We covered the tent with white sheets. (Thanks Karen for tent and sheets and Mik for the newsprint!) That was a tragic avalanche in which the parachuters were trapped! The kids went in with flashlights and rescued them though so all ended well.
Next we made cardboard flames and set the swing set on fire. Ethan and Amory were trapped inside! Luckily, we had some water balloons to use to douse the flames. Teo and Kyle were happy to aid in the rescue.
In fact, we found no shortage of volunteers.
Ethan and Amory were in no hurry to be rescued though.

Oddly, some people preferred air in their balloons.
Finally, we hung some small foam airplanes in the tree. We said they were having internal fires. of course you can't use plain water to dose a jet fuel fire. Since foam fire spray is expensive and dangerous, we settled for whipped cream.

Sam was willing to demonstrates good firefighting technique.
But really, who could have whipped cream and waste it all on some silly airplane fires?

Certainly not Ethan!

Nor Amory!
Piper managed to make a can explode.

Ryan was content to just play the gracious host, or is he taking them back to fill water balloons?
So, we had a very full week and now we have four sleeping boys and several slippery spots in the yard where the rain is busily washing away the whipped cream.

We also have a little bit of leftover cake.

This week in pictures

2008-06-13T18:52:00.000-07:00

On Monday Kim generously invited a bunch of people over to her house.

The slip and slide was a favorite activity.

Goat herding was also very popular.

Tuesday was a very busy day! First up was Ryan's gymnastic class where it was parent day. Ryan hates parents day. He doesn't like so many people looking at him. Ethan, however, got to show off in front of the parents as he demonstrated some cool moves to the younger kids.

This a photo of all the kids with the medals and certificates they got for finishing the class. Spies don't let people take their pictures. I mean, really, how would it look if a spy got photographed at training camp? Ryan is in the photo. He is hiding behind the girls standing in the back row, but you didn't hear that from me.

Next we went to Stephanie's house where Ryan got an early birthday present. Actually, he got 2 presents. One is a mandala drawing kit and the other is a stuffed olar bear. Last year Stephanie gave him a stuffed jaguar which he still carries around.

One of Stephanie's cats was very interested in a bag of beads and string I brought to work on.

In the evening we went to homeschoolers night at the New Britain Rockcats baseball game. There were 508 homeschoolers there. It was 97 degrees at game time, but that didn't stop Ethan and Ryan from settling in for food and fun with friends...
and without.

Of course, what's a sporting event without a bench-clearing brawl? Really Ethan is just tweaking Teo's nose. Teo thought this was big fun.

What's up with that?

Life is just a laugh riot when you're at the game.

On Wednesday we hung out with friends at Petersen Park in Wolcott, CT. One of the kids found a snake (a Northern Watersnake) which obligingly let me photograph him.

I also noticed a cool looking Green Frog in the creek.

I'll write more about the rest of the week later when I get the photos downloaded to the computer. Now it's time for me to have a hot drink to soothe my sore throat while I watch some television.

Rainbow Boys

2008-06-03T17:49:00.000-07:00

I was watering the garden today while Ethan and Ryan jumped on the trampoline. "You can't spray us Ba!" they yelled. I pretended not to hear them and continued watering.

They yelled some more and I turned innocently asking "What are you saying?" I "accidentally" sprayed them. This became a wonderful game. As I sprayed Ethan across the trampoline, I noticed a rainbow in the spray. It arched gracefully across both Ryan and Ethan. I wanted to grab the camera and get a picture of it, but there was no way to use the camera and the hose without interrupting our game. I love that my guys were playing in a rainbow today. They didn't even notice, but that made it all the more perfect.

Ethan's Birthday

2008-05-13T17:50:00.000-07:00

Today is Ethan's actual 8th birthday. In sharp contrast with the weekend activities, today was a normal day. We took Ryan to gymnastics in the morning and then went to Ethan's kung fu class. I made cupcakes last night which he shared wit hall his friends at kung fu. We gave him the choice of going to his friends' house, going to a play place, or going to a park with some other friends. Of course he chose going to his friends' house since his Pokémon-playing pals were going there.

He played Pokémon Stadium Battle and then they played together with the Wii. Even the delights of the electronic world couldn't keep him indoors though. He spent most of the day outside with Ean, Indy, Ben, Josh, Sam, and Ryan. I just realized that he managed yet another all-boy play day. After playing for hours, I had to tear him away so he could go to his gymnastics class. Now he's sound asleep, happily holding one of his new Pokémon figures.

Eight years ago tonight was a very bittersweet night for me. I had a beautiful new son, but I had lost his twin sister. She had a seizure in utero and was stillborn. Tonight I am, once again, happy and sad but for a completely different reason. My beautiful son is 8 years old and, somewhat selfishly, I don't want him to grow up. I know this almost cliché, but as much as I relish his growing independence, I miss the things he's outgrown. I look forward to the person he's becoming, but I know there will come a day when his birthday night will be a time he wants to share with friends, in a world I can never share. I want to keep him safe and protect him, but I also want to help him grow. I have conflicting desires, but I know which one will triumph. His birthday is just a reminder that my job is much harder than I ever imagined.

Down to 4 boys and 3 mommies

2008-05-10T16:53:00.000-07:00

Ethan's birthday party was wonderful. The guys ate tons of cereal and a gallon and a half of milk at breakfast. They woke up at around 5am, but I told them that it was too early. Oddly, they all laid down and went back to sleep until 6:15am. Even more oddly, they played quietly and let the two youngest, Arden and Ryan, sleep until 7am.

After that, it was all playing all the time. They went on the trampoline. They run through the house. They played with their DS's. They decorated the yard with streamers and balloons. I have to say here that Ben was especially helpful. He organized the decorating, helped make sure the little guys were included, and helped calm people down when people had conflicts. In addition to the 10 boys that slept over, another 10 kids came for the party.

Here's a small part of the crowd at our place today with Ethan front and center opening his gifts.

He got so many wonderful things. I honestly can't pick out a favorite gift he got this year.

Of course, no birthday is complete without a cake. Since his theme was Pokémon, it's only fitting that the cake was a Pokéball. Ethan was extremely pleased that he thought of having the cake color match the colors on the Pokéball. The red has strawberry cake. The white was vanilla cake, and teh brown has chocolate cake. I baked teh cakes and Esther formed them into the Pokéball.

The kids really liked playing on the swing set and the trampoline, but the grown-ups seemed to prefer sitting in the shade.

Now it's 8pm and all the kids but Doran and Amory have gone home. They are staying until tomorrow when their dad will come to take them back to Salem, MA.

I know a lot of people would boggle at the thought of having that many kids, and I did too at first, but it's really a lot easier to watch 12 kids than 3 or 4. With 3 or 4 kids they seem to brake up into 2 with 1 left out or 3 with one left out, but with 12 they formed groups that formed, reformed, shifted, and changed. It was easy enough to keep them occupied and happy. The downside is that having 12 would cost far more than our budget allow. I guess I'll have to settle for occasionally having an extra 10 spend the night.

Tonight 12 Boys, Still Only 3 Mommies

2008-05-09T19:43:00.000-07:00

It's Ethan's birthday weekend and the first part of his birthday is a sleepover party. We told him he could have a total of 4 friends so naturally we have 12 boys including Ethan and Ryan. It's great. They ate pizza and cupcakes, jumped on the trampoline in the rain, played with their DS's, and giggled insanely.

12 boys and 1 girl. Anne (our next door neighbor) came over for the pizza and cupcakes.

After that they watched a movie (Purple People Eater: 1980s, B-grade, fabulous. Go thou and watch it.) and ate popcorn.

Of course you can't just watch a movie. You need to play with your DS while you watch the movie.

Some quotes:

Ba (noticing that Doran is wearing a t-shirt advertising the members of a family not his own): Doran, where did that shirt come from?
Doran: My house.

Anne: There are 12 boys here?! I will count them. (She goes to the living room doorway.) 1-2-3-4-5- 1-2-3- They are hard to count when they are moving.

Ken (Coming in to drop off Beckett and Sawyer): How many boys are here?
Ba: 12
Ken: You can smell the testosterone.

Now the boys are all in beds, and sleeping bags, and on couches. They have their blankets and stuffed animals. They are whispering frantically to each other: "Shh." "Go to sleep." "You go to sleep." "I can't while you're talking." "Shh!" "You shh!" "Move over." "Get off the blanket." "It's my blanket." "Is not." *Hard tug on blanket* "Oh, it is." "Move your foot." "That's not my foot." "It's my foot." "Well move it." "OK." "OK." "OK." *Maniacal laughter* in chorus: "OK-OK-OK-OK" *Laughter* "Shh will you!" "Right." "OK." *Groans* "Not again."

This is the life. I can't imagine a better way to spend a Friday night.

Swords and Looms

2008-04-30T17:27:00.001-07:00

Today we made swords from PVC pipes, foam insulation, and colored duct tape and/or making portable tapestry looms using wood, screws, and wing nuts. We had 15 kids and 6 mommies (including us and our guys) play, eat, make things, and have fun.

Sawyer and Beckett opted for the basic silver duct tape.

Silver was popular. Chloe, Tessa, and Teo all chose that. Deva went with full-on color.

We did get the adults to participate. Stephanie and Peg had never used power tools before.

Esther showed Peg how to use a saw and the drill! Stephanie learned, too, but I didn't get a photo.

I think Peg likes her loom. Karen has screws and wing nuts. She has a loom, too, if all the holes will ever line up.

Stephanie made a loom, too. She said it's picture perfect.

Ethan and Ryan and the other kids somehow managed to avoid having their photos taken. I'm not sure exactly how that happened. We'll have to photos of them when they take their swords out to battle.

Alphabetize, avalanche, and gardening

2008-04-25T17:23:00.000-07:00

Friday is cleaning day in our house. Ryan and Ethan cleaned their rooms, though I have to hand it to Ethan. His room has pretty much been clean since last week. I managed to get all the laundry washed, hung out, and taken in before night fall. That has to be a record.

I got into the garden today. The seedlings are coming along nicely, so I took the time to move around some plants. The back fence now has a nice row of hosta and pother plants. Ryan thought the I had dug up a row of dirt for him personally. He got a few Rescue Heroes and one of their vehicles and created a scenario in which they were stuck in an avalanche. He informed me that I could take all the dirt I wanted as long as I didn't free said vehicle.

Ethan has found that he can battle and trade Pokemon with his friends while talking to them through the DS all via our wireless internet. In order to do this efficiently, he has to be able to locate his Pokemon quickly and easily. This prompted him to learn first letter alphabetization. Score one for the unschooling concept.

Clean rooms, freshly laundered clothing, rearranged plants, alphabetizing, and an avalanche overcome all make this a good day.

Boys' Group

2008-04-17T17:05:00.001-07:00

We got to spend the entire glorious sunny afternoon with our friends from northern and eastern Connecticut. Shelley and Lori each have two wonderful boys whose ages just happen to coincide perfectly with our guys. We went to Addison Park and then for a walk in, well actually, I have no idea what the name of the nature preserve was where we went after that, but it was great. Ethan and Ryan had a blast. Ethan taught the other boys his version of rock paper scissors in which you can say any noun after you say shoot and then you figure out who wins. This means that if I say the conventional scissor and Ethan says human, he wins because humans can use scissors. On the other hand, if I say the conventional rock and he says computer, I win because rock smashes computer. All the boys thought this game was big fun. They threw sticks in the water, ran ahead of the mommies, and climbed piles of dirt. Life is good when it's warm out and I don't have to say no or stop.

Here are some photos I took of the day:

I have other photos, but that's all blogger will let me upload. Shelley, Lori, if you want the others, I'll get them to you.

Stitches, Spring, and Sports

2008-04-13T16:19:00.000-07:00

To say we've been busy is a bit of an understatement. Along with the regular assortment of play groups, play dates, gymnastics and kung fu classes, we've had house guests, holidays, and even a trip to the emergency room. Ryan fell down and split his lip open. Five stitches, one puzzle, and one dump truck later he is stitch-free and happy.

Spring has found us outside much more often. Ethan and Ryan now get up and run outside to jump on the trampoline. Despite my warnings that they shouldn't flip over in mid-air, I know they are doing exactly that. I could try to work up to being truly upset about it, but I know that I would do the same thing if I could.

Their birthdays are coming up soon, Ethan in May and Ryan and June. Ethan had said that he wanted a Wii, but abruptly changed his mind last week and now wants Pokemon themed gifts. I'm a little surprised by this since he loves to play with his friends' Wiis, but knowing how much he adores all things Pokemon, I'm not completely shocked.

Ryan wants a spy-themed party. No surprise there at all. we're going to assemble a spy briefcase for him with a magnifying glass, a light in the shape of a pen, a flashlight, a lock-picking set, and such. I need to start checking thrift stores to find a second hand briefcase.

In the meantime, the library playgroup has moved into the park, and we'll start running a sports program again this year. This year instead of having baseball every week we'll have different sports like kickball, frisbee, horseshoes, and croquet. That will have to wait until May though when the weather is less soggy and jackets are, more or less, optional. For now, we'll enjoy the sunny days and bounce on the trampoline to keep warm.

St. Patrick's Day, Ice Cream. and Kids

2008-03-19T18:25:00.000-07:00

It's been a good few days. For St. Patrick's Day we made an entirely green meal: fried eggs, pan-toasted buttered pita, boiled potatoes, broccoli, milk, and angel food cake with cream cheese icing all liberally altered with food dye. The guys loved it. We also played a game all day which involved saying "St. Patrick's Day!" whenever you saw a shamrock or other St. Patrick's Day themed item. Since we went to Stew Leonard's, we saw a lot of of them. We also got ice cream.

Tuesday was busy. It always is, but this week it was exceptionally busy. We went to the Scholastic book sale with Stephanie and her kids and got a number of things for the guys and for the gift closet. After that we picked up our neighbor's daughter from school and went over to our friends' farm to see the new babies. They had lots of kids, lambs, and chicks. Ryan liked petting and being petted by the goats, but I think Ethan's favorite part was when he got to climb on the dirt pile that's been built up from clearing and grading the new road.

It was drizzling when we got to the farm, then it started to snow. The sun was out even while it was snowing. The snow stopped,and the sky cleared. The sunset was absolutely amazing. The building is the brand new chicken palace that Mark just finished building.

Today we dyed eggs using rubber bands, scotch tape, and stickers as resists. Those worked really well. We mostly used white eggs, but tried 3 brown ones just to see how they'd turn out. They came out really nice, I thought. I need to get some photos of them before they turn into deviled eggs and egg salad this weekend.

I'm glad it's rained the past few Wednesdays. It gives me an extra incentive to be in the house. Even if I don't always accomplish all the things I want to get done, I do get to spend more time with Ethan and Ryan without the pressure of knowing that we have to be someplace at a specific time.

Spies and switched identities

2008-03-11T16:41:00.000-07:00

Ryan was going to play Candyland with Jeanne after dinner, but when I asked Ethan if he wanted to come with me to take the dog for a walk, Ryan immediately said "I want to go!" I warned him that if he went with me Candyland was out of the question tonight. He didn't care.

We donned some warm jackets and set off. He skipped along next to me offering me his theories about why the birds were being so noisy. I have to admit that I never considered that they were complaining because it was much early to go to bed. I also never thought that they might be having dinner and telling each other what they did during the day. I suggested that they might be saying good night to each other, but Ryan explained that birds only say good night after the sunlight is completely gone.

Ryan wanted to walk through the school parking lot and along a curving street toward the park. I don't generally walk along that street because the trees and bushes aren't well maintained. He pointed out the sidewalks were not clean and that "whoever works in these buildings needs to have a clean up day because all the garbage lying around is rude." I couldn't agree more. He suggested we pick it up as we walk, but soon realized taht there was more garbage than we could carry and that there aren't any rubbish bins in which to put the trash we had picked up.

After a few blocks, a couple turned from a side street onto the street we walking along. "Shhhh," Ryan told me, "See those guys up there? Those guys are spies for real."

"Really? How can you tell?"

"Because Ba, they're wearing blue shirts and dark pants. All the spies wear that."

"Oh, OK. How do you know that's what spies wear?"

"Because I'm a spy!" You can't argue with that.

The couple turned off, and we turned back toward the house. Ryan announced that he was cold. He wouldn't wear a hat or gloves when we left the house,so this didn't surprise me. "Would you like my hat?" What a silly questions. About a block later he was wearing my gloves as well.

He held out his hands, my gloves dangling off them, and announced, "I am Mister Ba."

I laughed. "You are Ryan and I am Ba."

"No sir. You are wrong. You are Ryan, and I am Ba. See?" He held out his hands again.

I tapped the top of his head. "I am bigger, and you are littler. I am Ba, and you are Ryan."

He came right next to me. "OK. Stop please." I stopped. He put his little foot next to mine. He looked caught out.

"See? Your foot is smaller. You are Ryan."

"No way!" He ran ahead and stopped near the dog. "Make him stand still please." I had the dog stand still. "See?" He put his foot next to Croydon's. "My foot is bigger. I am Mister Ba!" He danced ahead of me. "I am big and I can do anything and I can cross the street all by myself!"

"Not yet," I tell him. "you still need my hand."

He considered this as we approached a busier street. "OK," he said at last. He took my hand. We crossed the street. Halfway across he grinned at me. "I am holding your hand. I am Ba and you are Ryan."

"I am holding your hand."

"No no no! I am holding your hand." We walk another block. "How long until we get home?"

"Only three more blocks. Do you want to jump up and be my backpack guy?"

"OK Ba."

"I thought you were Ba."

"No. I decided that you're big enough to be Ba." I pulled him onto my back. We walked toward home. "Ba?"

"What love?"

"Will you always be my Ba?"

"Yup. Will you always be my Ryan?"

"Uh-huh. You can have your hat now."

Cupcakes on a Tuesday

2008-03-04T17:31:00.000-08:00

Tuesday's are typically our busiest day. Ryan has gymnastics at 9:30am. Ethan has home school Kung Fu 11:00am. While Ethan is in Kung Fu, Ryan plays with the other kids who aren't taking Kung Fu. Esther and I get to string beads and talk with the other mommies. After Kung Fu, we usually have a play date with other people from the class. Then Ethan has his gymnastics class at 4:00pm.

Today, after Kung Fu, we and Stephanie went to a fabric store in Cheshire and spent far too much money on fabric for three table cloths and some fabric we're not sure how we're going to use. Probably it'll be kitchen curtains. After that we got to go home and be in the house for a while. It felt decadent since we don't usually go home in the middle of a Tuesday. I got to make cupcakes with Ryan. Ryan loves making things with my big blue friend (AKA a Kitchen Aid). He wanted to make cookies as well, but after walking the dog and cleaning up from cupcakes it was time to make dinner.

It's going to rain tomorrow, and we're going to have a rain day and stay in the house. I see cookies in our Wednesday.

New Adventures

2008-02-14T16:44:00.001-08:00

Today we met up with some new friends at Imagination Nation. It was wonderful. Five moms, 7 boys, and lots of room to explore and play. We've never had an all boy play date before. It was fun to see them all play together, separate, form groups, change groups, and come together again. As if that weren't enough, we all got ice cream at the end.

After that we went over to the Manross Library for their Superhero Academy. Ethan had a blast there at the program, and Ryan had fun playing with the younger kids. There were lots of wonderful home school moms, so we got time to be with adults. I wonder if this program will push our spy games over in favor of superhero ones. I doubt it, but I do think there might be a super-spy in our future.

Spy Tracks

2008-02-13T18:08:00.000-08:00

We had scheduled things for today, but decided to have a rain day instead. Ethan and Ryan wanted to earn some money by shoveling sleet this morning, so we let Ethan do the front walk and Ryan do the back steps. Ethan did a great job. Ryan did an interesting one. I'm not sure that he was ever actually on the back steps except to use them as an entrance and egress, but I know he was all over the rest of the yard.

I discovered today that post-it notes are also integral to being a spy. I came into the kitchen this morning to find a trail of post-its across the floor. When I asked why they were there, I was told they were "spy tracks". Apparently spies leave post-it tracks when footprints are unavailable. Luckily Ryan left actual footprints in the yard as they are self-cleaning unlike post-its.

It's all about the gadgets

2008-02-10T18:05:00.001-08:00

Ethan and Ryan have decided that being spies is the coolest adventure in the world. Ryan has a spy for longer than Ethan. He has a real spy id card that he got in the mail from a mysterious place called Spy Headquarters. It has his name, spy number (12345), and picture. Ethan really wants one to come in the mail for him. I told him that I thought one would come one day soon.

Being a spy involves having a briefcase, a magnifying glass, a fake mustache, and a pen and paper. It has optional componants like fingerprint ink and fingerprint dust. In Ryan's case it involves following people if they are "auspicious" (acting suspiciously) and making booby traps to catch bad guy spies who sneak into his room. For Ethan it involves many calls in code on a cell phone and writing secret notes that change in meaning depending on who is reading them. They both use clever disguises which they assemble from the dress-up box. Today a very short repair guy walked through the house assuring me that his bright blue hard hard and purple shawl proved that he was "nothing to be concerned about." In fact, he was just "checking on things to make sure nothing was, um, broken."

They've been tracking where the grown-ups go by using the magnifying glass to find footprints on the floors, and today they guessed who drank the water by comparing fingerprints they lifted off a glass with the ones everyone put on a piece of paper. I have no idea what's in store for tomorrow, but I do know that even though Ryan really really wants an Aston-Martin with a revolving license plate and a steel bar that comes out of the center of the each tire to knock other spy cars off the road buying one is not on tomorrow's agenda.

Spelling and Friends

2008-01-27T18:17:00.000-08:00

Ethan is thoroughly enjoying his spelling. He laughs when I go to him and say, "Pop quiz!" He is rocketing though the lists I have and only gets irritated if he gets a word wrong. I wish I had enjoyed spelling as much as he does. I detested it growing up. My mother would drill me on words and my overriding thought was: "I hope this will be over soon."

We had friends from Massachusettes here this weekend so our child count doubled. Doran and Amory go to public school. We met them because their mom buys beads from Esther and me. They had never been to our house before although we've stayed at their house several times. It was a weekend fun fest. Ethan played on his DS with them. Ryan jumped on the trampoline with them. They all played troll together which seems to involve building castles out of the large blocks we have in the living room allowing three of the boys to hide behind them while the fourth one attacks the castle and its inhabitants with a pillow while grunting. Big fun for the 4 to 10-year-old set.

For me the perk was hanging out with Jeff, Doran and Amory's mom, and getting all four boys to help move things from the basement to the third floor so Esther and I can sort them. Jeanne got to spend the weekend studying for the silly social work exam that Connecticut is forcing her to take because it won't accept her Louisiana social work license. She claims this was fun. I have my doubts.

Now all the house guests are gone and a nice cup of cocoa is calling me. I am incapable of ignoring the call of cocoa while the wind is rattling my windows.

The Candy Shop & Current Goals

2008-01-18T17:31:00.000-08:00

For the past two days the guys have been using all of Ryan's tools and a few other toys to create a pretend candy shop. I've been given several tours and have even been allowed to work the ~~drill~~ frozen lollipop maker.

They made up tour tickets and set up a counter at the doorway to Ryan's room from which they can sell their wares. Ethan realized that he ought to be collecting sales tax, so he's been practicing adding 6% to all the sales. He's found out that he can only easily figure out the tax if the sale is a whole dollar amount.

I went over some spelling words with Ethan yesterday and sailed right through the first two lists I had. He stumbled a bit on the third list because it has pen, pin, and pan which give him trouble. He told me that he's going to learn them by next week because he wants a new list. He asked me how many lists I had and I told him I have 40. He said he wants to finish all forty by the spring. He will, too.

Ryan is currently obsessed with the books Pirates Don't Change Diapers by Melinda Long and David Shannon (which is the second in a series by the same authors) and Radio Rescue by Lynne Barasch. The pirate book is a picture book and the rescue book is a true story about a boy who saves people using a ham radio. Ryan says he wants to learn Morse code. "I don't want to send messages. I just want to learn all the letters and numbers." I can't wait until we go back to Philadelphia so he try the telegraph key at the Franklin Institute. He's been there before, but I don't think the telegraph key made a big impression on him the first time.

Busy Day

2008-01-16T18:12:00.000-08:00

They guys had quite the busy day today. Ethan went with Jeanne to her doctor appointment and then Esther and I took him and Ryan to the GNHH play group. That was a lot of fun. Ryan ran around like a nut, his favorite thing to do, and Ethan found some more kids who into Pokemon. Kati called while we were at play group and invited the guys over to her house to hang out with Kyle in the afternoon. After all that action, Ethan was a little overwhelmed. He had 2 meltdowns tonight. I think tomorrow will be a stay-at-home day.